General Rules
Common courtesy, politeness, and general civility are expected of all members and guests.
Foul language in general conversation is unnecessary and not acceptable. Likewise, using abbreviations or synonyms to get around this rule are not appreciated nor acceptable. There are other rooms where vulgarity, cussing, cursing, and swearing are acceptable. If it is too challenging to communicate without relying on using foul language you are strongly encouraged to find those rooms.
Comments expressing racism or bigotry towards any group of people are not welcome in this group and will not be tolerated. There is little humor in jokes that rely on demeaning the conditions or circumstances of people different than you.
If you are told to cease your behavior by a host do so without question or commenting in the room. If you have a question about why you were told to stop simply whisper the host. We prefer to do without drama.
No one’s 1st amendment rights are being violated by any of these rules so please do not try to make an argument of that. There are other rooms to visit that may not find your comments offensive and you are encouraged to go to them.
- NO means NO: When a person says NO it means NO. This includes refusing to continue with an open room discussion, private whisper, a demand or request for service or sceneing. NO is always to be considered as final. It does not matter what previous consent was given, no means no and stop means stop and a person does not have to justify their refusal. Simply cease and desist.
- Flirting: Polite flirting is allowed. If your flirting crosses the line into annoying or offensive trolling or sophomoric idiocy ... you will be expected to stop immediately when told.
- Yes Sir, no Sir: No individual can insist that others refer to them by a title or honorific.
- Keep your hands to yourself: Do not touch another person who has not consented to being touched. Pinching, petting, pawing, or groping another person is not cute, humorous, or playful. If this is your idea of fun you will have to find that fun elsewhere.
- NO swords ... NO guns ... NO WMDs: Like any reputable off-line BDSM club, D/s group or House this is a Weapons-Free Zone.
Nothing may have caused more drama in chat rooms over the years than the issue of whispering. At one end of the spectrum was the thought that asking for permission to talk privately should be required and not doing so was an act of disrespect. At the other end was the perspective that as adults it is far more disrespectful to require someone to ask for permission to whisper an individual.
The requirement to ask permission can be an unnecessary and unreasonable burden as it puts both people on public display and can cause perceptions of either person that may not be accurate and possibly lead to unnecessary gossip. Moreover, in trying to keep the room as close to an off-line setting as possible, it would be rare that a person would be forced to ask permission in front of everyone to speak privately with another individual at an off-line gathering.
With the whisper/private messaging system in Buzzen every person can take responsibility for him or herself. It is easy enough to simply 1) shut down whispers; 2) decline a whisper you do not wish to take; and/or 3) politely tell the person you do not care to whisper at this time.
Demonstrating respect for your collar is incumbent on you. Individuals who wear a collar are not being disrespected simply because someone whispers you and it is not a cause for creating drama. You are capable of shutting off whispers, declining a whisper or you can simply respond by telling the person you are not allowed to accept whispers and then close the whisper window.
If your whisper is declined or the person tells you that she or he does not want to whisper, cease whispering. No means no and people do not need to justify why they choose not to whisper with you.
To Sir or not to Sir
The requirement to ask permission can be an unnecessary and unreasonable burden as it puts both people on public display and can cause perceptions of either person that may not be accurate and possibly lead to unnecessary gossip. Moreover, in trying to keep the room as close to an off-line setting as possible, it would be rare that a person would be forced to ask permission in front of everyone to speak privately with another individual at an off-line gathering.
With the whisper/private messaging system in Buzzen every person can take responsibility for him or herself. It is easy enough to simply 1) shut down whispers; 2) decline a whisper you do not wish to take; and/or 3) politely tell the person you do not care to whisper at this time.
Demonstrating respect for your collar is incumbent on you. Individuals who wear a collar are not being disrespected simply because someone whispers you and it is not a cause for creating drama. You are capable of shutting off whispers, declining a whisper or you can simply respond by telling the person you are not allowed to accept whispers and then close the whisper window.
If your whisper is declined or the person tells you that she or he does not want to whisper, cease whispering. No means no and people do not need to justify why they choose not to whisper with you.
To Sir or not to Sir
Over the years, another frequent cause of drama in chat has been the attempt of individuals to impose their self-conferred title on others. This usually happens in one of two ways: 1) Someone declaring that it is part of the “universal protocol of The Lifestyle” or 2) those who affix a self-conferred title to their nic.
First of all, there is no such thing as a universal protocol. It is purely a myth. Those who claim that a "one size fits all" set of protocol exists (for a variety of behavior) are attempting to appear knowledgeable and authoritative while actually revealing how poorly informed and truly inexperienced they are.
Secondly, imposing a self-declared title on others through its inclusion in a nic is a ridiculously transparent manipulation and once again diminishes the credibility of the individual who uses this tactic.
It is perfectly appropriate to address MasterTony or SirTony simply as Tony and MissAdele or LadyAdele merely as Adele.
First of all, there is no such thing as a universal protocol. It is purely a myth. Those who claim that a "one size fits all" set of protocol exists (for a variety of behavior) are attempting to appear knowledgeable and authoritative while actually revealing how poorly informed and truly inexperienced they are.
Secondly, imposing a self-declared title on others through its inclusion in a nic is a ridiculously transparent manipulation and once again diminishes the credibility of the individual who uses this tactic.
It is perfectly appropriate to address MasterTony or SirTony simply as Tony and MissAdele or LadyAdele merely as Adele.
