Degrees of submission

StealthSpanker™ : for this discussion, as with most discussions, there isnt a right or wrong answer .... I have a a standard answer for a relationship be it M/s D/s etc ..... for Me it is 2 ppl going forward for there O/own common good, how they get there depends on communication for one

simply_s : speaking for myself, the title alone was a red flag. Degree of submissioin. I immeditalty felt on defensive.like the submissive/slave debate....is one "more" then the other....is one better because of what they desire or what they are able to give of  themselves

total_surrender : i agree with s... i was going to skip the discussion all together... it is an uncomfortable topic... and quite honestly... how i submit or perhaps i should say how fully i submit is based on whom i am submitting too and not who i am

simply_s : reading it i started thinking more in terms of definitions of rather then "degrees'

StealthSpanker™ : I knew when I read this it would generate many opinions and that is what this for

total_surrender : but it also can hurt feelings... my submission is very personal... and what is full submission to me... may not be to another

StealthSpanker™ : that is 100% correct surre .... same goes for a Dominant ... what I do is for Me no one else except the person I’m with

total_surrender : yes Sir... and those that are off line might have an opinion different than online submissives... i know before coming here i did ... but i have come to know s... and i know her commitment to Sir Ulrich is as real for her and her Master... as mine was to Kirk

simply_s : i have learned not to let that bother me....what O/others think, or feel i "should be" or how i "should behave" and i at different times have had people refer to me as different ones of these definitions.....but have been people who judge by me here in the room and in truth have no idea what i do or dont do, or how i serve or don't serve .

StealthSpanker™ : it is all indivual tastes ... compatibility with your partner means something to Me

nitey : I saw some realities in the 9 degrees ....  i think there are degrees of submission and probably degrees of Dominance as well

total_surrender : but i rather not have the lable of what degree i am... it is distressing to me to even think about trying to fit in one of those boxes

nitey : to me, it is a creative framework .... i dont think of it as labels .... do you think that this is similar to phases of a relationship?

total_surrender : i did not see that at all... but i could see how some might

nitey : otherwise i agree with s , no one wants to be categorized in a box or im sorry agree with total surrender

simply_s : for me was more a shift in my thinking...and pushing aside the title. it could be phases, and some will go through various ones, others will remain at a set place. and neither is wrong if it is where they are happy and works for them

nitey : i agree

total_surrender : i agree

nitey : there are some who are simply masochist and those people find sadists to match to

₣яέέ·Şŏŋŋỹ : too often people type cast others based on what their perception is

simply_s : nods, true Sir. people see how O/one behaves in a room and decide they must be ..............?

chiarã : this girl's opinion is rather uncomplicated...as i expressed to Master Stealth this morning the lifestyle is taylor made to the Ttwo involved

«¤døxîégìr£¤» : i think the artical made it sound like a game and its not a game

chiarã : to some it is...and thats really ok ... to some it is just play to Oothers it is deeper and more meaningful

«¤døxîégìr£¤» : all i can say each to to Tthier own and if some want to play only in the bed room so be it

chiarã : exactly doxie

nitey : isn't just about who and whatever people are? .... for a while in my life there was a Sadist that i was only masochist with ... that is all...nothing more ... it was great too

StealthSpanker™ : to Me it is so much more meaning ful out of the bedroom the caring of a Dominant for His girl and vice versa

chiarã : what happens in the bedroom is an extension of the rest of the relationship ... if the rest of the relationship is deep and meaningful then the physical expression is also

simply_s : for many that is all they desire from it, and they shold not be made to feel it is wrong (in my opinion) anymore then T/those who wish to give every detail of their life up to another.....or those who are the many places in between

nitey : i would agree

total_surrender : i agree s

chiarã : agree wholeheartedly s

StealthSpanker™ : icing on tha cake and I have My cake and eat it too

total_surrender : i do not want other to judge me or how what i do

nitey : do they judge you ? ... i dont think anyone ever noticed me enough to judge anything....i am going to have to consider this.

«¤døxîégìr£¤» : i do not understand how the can say they are slave but not commited it was confusing to me

simply_s : see, that should be ok too nitey....for some there does not have to be, or may even prefer there is not an emotional tie . It works for them,

chiarã : whatever works...to each his/her own as was already said

nitey : i think there are slaves that are not in committed relationships who might feel satisfied at the moment in a "lesser" or less intense degree of submission or even just take comfort in it?

chiarã : i feel it is just about defining one's self...no one else

total_surrender : ~nods~ i am uncollared but do not think of myself as less because of it

freshy : (sorry, hi everyone. i'm away on the phone. my input is that i thought it was about motivation-notlike how much motivation but types of motivation . sorry sorry-hurrying as best as i can)

«¤døxîégìr£¤» : i am no less being un collared

nitey : true doxie, very true..collared does not define self .... you are who you are no?

simply_s : nods, why i said freshy that what i had problem with was more the title. then the context

chiarã : no more than a wedding band defines you

₣яέέ·Şŏŋŋỹ : ;the thing is...be yourself...we all go thru phases...and what suites us now may not tomorrow..what our human need is now,,sexual need, emotional need may change and change often

«¤døxîégìr£¤» : i am me no matter what like me or hate me but i am not changeing ... i mean i am not changeing to fit someone else

nitey : good on you doxie ... good girl ....smiles ... happiness is a wonderful thing

«¤døxîégìr£¤» : i do not feel like i am makeing sense

chiarã : most important thing is to be genuine...and real in whatever degree of submission one finds themselves in

nitey : there are degrees to that too

chiarã : you are doxie

simply_s : making perfect sense doxie.

StealthSpanker™ : if one wishes to call it degrees ... I call it who you are and what you want to achieve

simply_s : think the core of who i am ....that is to strong to change m maybe could pretend for while but eventually it would come through ....  went through different ones of these "degrees learning who i am... some steps forward some back.